The Five Stages

I've known pretty much my four years here that I was working towards a career in a dying field. English has always been a running joke when it comes to majors its easy to take swings at. But I topped it off with an editing minor, envisioning years spent working in NYC, busting about in white and black and Louboutin heels I could afford because I just perfected the next best seller. There'd be a toast I couldn't drink to as my eager assistant rushed about to prove himself until that inevitable day I asked him to marry me to avoid deportation.

Just kidding about that last part.

But, seriously, I knew deep down things were changing. There was a change in the air, a shift in the wind. Life was different, dreams would be deferred: print publishing...was dying.

I read an article in the New York Times that reminded me of all this. It awoke a plethora of feelings as it discussed the merger between two major publishing houses, Penguin and Random House (side note: their new name? Penguin Random House. Which just doesn't have quite the same ring to it). It got me thinking about my destiny (you know, the champagne toasting one) and my past, which I neatly categorized into five original stages* (*these aren't original at all.)

Denial: I came to college with a self-assured faith in books' awesomeness. They're not going anywhere, I thought. Nothing is changing. As long as I believe, they'll last. Just like Santa. So I bought up books by the dozen (silently and secretly resenting the cost of them, but that's beside the point). I stuffed books all throughout my room, ignoring the fire hazard and already plotting out an escape route to save them all in case disaster struck. I hummed and sang as I alphabetized and organized, so impressed by my blossoming library. I thought how, one day, my house would have a room like this:

It was my goal. I thought nothing would stand in my way.

Anger: Then I started really looking into the publishing field. This was a complicated stage, layered like a bitter parfait. I was a starry-eyed sophomore who thought I'd get a book published and make millions with with to travel the world and buy houses. But I found out the dark side of the publishing industry: the sheer cost, the tiny cut an author gets. 7%--if you're lucky? You've got to be kidding me. I considered going to the dark side (e-publishing), but no one takes you seriously after that. It's a field for the rejected, or so the large houses told me. I felt my dreams being crushed, flayed, and laid to wither and die. My print world betrayed me. And yet they in turn ignored the e-world? Who could win in such a horrific world? And so it began: the bargaining.  

Bargaining: I began asking for some give and take, even expecting it. there had to be some middle ground, some happy medium where print publishing didn't sabotage and kill itself while e-books won. I mean, why kill print?  A Kindle doesn't smell good. It doesn't laugh or cry or sigh with you with each crinkling turn of the page. It won't ever start falling apart, a sign of your devotion. And you definitely can't prove your intellectualism with a kindle--people need to be able to walk into your house, see a room bursting with books, and simply "ooh" and "ahh" over your elitism. But that seems like a world that will never be. Books are expensive, electronic-everything is cheap--it's a match made in heaven. So maybe if the publishing houses would be more open-minded--maybe if I was more open-minded I could accept a truce, a tie, a white flag of salvation. But selling out makes me sad.

Depression: Last year, I thought my world was over. Woe was me. I lost my faith in humanity, asking why--oh, heavens, why--must people always sell out? For three days and three nights, I curled up upon and with my hundreds of books and wept a thousand tears. Just kidding. But it was a dark time. I felt sure the only thing left for me to do was take on the banner and die defending print. I would not let a modern version of Fahrenheit 451 go down. In fact, my future looked to be one of collecting and treasuring printed books, guarding them against the internet locos who wanted them destroyed, sending me trojan horses in the form of Kindles and Nooks. I was ready to die in a pile of tear-drenched pages. It was my destiny.

And then I thought about it.   

Acceptance: The inevitable conclusion fell into place. That is, life is changed and I have to deal. It was a settling of fate, a shaking of hands with the devil (that would be e-books, here). Though sometimes I still cringe at the idea of e-books and only e-books, I can't help but agree that they're useful, beautiful, cheaper things that benefit a lot more than just the publisher. The writer gets a larger cut, the books reach more people. And...it saves trees. Not that I really care about that (only joking).

But, in all honesty, I am settled. I know I am walking a path that will not be walked so much anymore. Print publishing is dying. When two of the largest companies consolidate to save themselves and the rest clamber to do the same, it's kind of a sign of changing times. But maybe not so much a sign of the end of the world. As one of the interviewee's point out,

“Regulators generally understand that these companies aren’t just competing with each other, they’re competing with a very changed marketplace.”

Ah, yes. A changed marketplace. So I don't have to sacrifice my dreams of being an editor per se. I don't have to give up on fiction and writing and creation. It's just a changed landscape. So maybe I'll still get that champagne-ridden affair.

Just...probably via Skype.

A Little Thank You

My oldest sister has Aspergers. She's incredibly smart and totally amazing and, honestly, perfectly normal--high functioning and all that. But she was bullied all through school, even got stress-induced alopecia through junior high and high school (kids can be real jerks). But she wasn't diagnosed till far later in life--and, even then, only after doing some research on her own and then seeking out a doctor. Everyone just thought she was odd, she was being difficult, she was shy, she was aggressive, she was reactive, etc., etc., etc. So life was hard for her. And no one really knew why she couldn't 'make friends and influence people.'

Luckily for her, this digital age was booming.

People often make fun of video gamers, fan-fiction writers, even bloggers. People who need relationships online obviously can't make friends in real life and that's bad.  Wrong. My sister has been able to connect with so many people and grow in so many ways because of the Internet.

1. A little thing called WoW. Now, I'm never been into the gaming scene, wait my sister became obsessed, excitedly introducing me to her avatar and explaining everything she has to do to do whatever. I dunno, but she loved it. She made friends from it. Friends she has gotten to know outside the video game. When she found out some of her coworkers played too, she suddenly had something to talk about with them. And her interactions online, no matter how foreign to me, helped her figure out sociality outside of the game too.

Is this WOW? I'm not exactly sure. It may be another game, but this is her avatar.

2. Blogging. Yeah, my shy, supposedly socially awkward sister was the first in our family to have a blog. It started as a place to vent feelings and rant about all sorts of stuff, but eventually it blossomed into an opportunity for her to become aware of her personality. There was something freeing about being diagnosed--as she says it, she's different, not defective. And she used her website as a chance to challenge herself to try harder. She'd share goals and then explain how they went: talking to her boss, saying good morning to people she didn't like, looking people in the eye when she was talking to them.

3. Fan fiction. She is a huge writer. It's something she can organize and control, and she loves it. So she started this little HP fan fiction piece where Harry Potter has Aspergers. It has amassed a huge following and people are really behind the idea, commenting on how real it is, how it hoped so and so understand their cousin or neighbor who has Aspergers. It's all been a great boon in her life, not only to have that community but to have people react to her in such positive ways.

The "Cover Art" for her fan fiction

No longer is it bad news to have a "disability"--it can't even be called that. People have communities available to them everywhere and I think that's amazing. It's not taboo to talk about these things anymore. One of my favorite TV shows, Parenthood, features a young boy with Aspergers and his family's struggle to appreciate it. Things are getting exposure. They're being talked about. You don't have to be alone, you don't have to feel constantly misunderstood. My sister has been able to seek out safe havens for her to be herself--all thanks to the internet.

And, yes, some people spend too much time online. She had to give up WoW after coming out of a day long session realizing she'd forgotten to take her dog out and they'd done their business...everywhere. So moderation in all things. But at least allow for the possibility of what a positive and powerful influence technology can be. It connects people first and foremost--to information, to others. This age is a beautiful one and I think it's time parents stop fighting it and start exploring it both with an open mind and a positive outlook with their kids. You never know the good that can come from it--in all sorts of ways.

My sister is the funniest, sunniest person you could hope to meet. She's dry and sarcastic and, yeah, sometimes a little affronting. But she has this bright, loud guffaw that just gets you right in the heart: she knows how to love life. It's such a turn around from the angry, confused teenager who thought she was wrong, she was broken, she was worthless. It was only when she found her footing on the digital landscape that she realized how great she is. Yes, she has an online presence--a huge one compared to mine--but it is that online interactivity that has allowed her to enjoy more of life in person. She's one of my heroes, and I'm so grateful that technology has proven that to even more people.

Social Proof

For our magazine, we had a little info session last night. I dragged some roommates and siblings to it just for some extra bodies. But I was pleased to see that we had two totally random walk-ins who had just heard about it somewhere and were excited enough to come check it out. Awesome. But it turned out to be a great little party with some great advice. I think our group definitely had a clearer understanding of what was needed to make the website more accessible and even approachable to get the kind of response we want.

What a relief.

But, really, there's something solid now, and a better idea of what can happen and why. A lot of problems were addressed and simultaneously solved, so yay for outside advice. We can get so close-minded in our little groups. We know what we want and expect and so we see it already there even if it's not. This "social proof" experiment allowed for us to take a step back and truly examine what our audience--those that know nothing about us to begin with--truly thought.

So, yeah, I'm a big fan of social proof now. I can be a little hoighty-toighty when it comes to my work, maybe a little prideful and self-confident. But this reminded me that there's something to be gained from listening to the crowd.

Even if it is only six people deep.

Menagerie-ing

As hopefully all of you know, I'm part of a team creating an online magazine called Menagerie. It's been quite the process and it's gone through quite a few drafts. Though it's still "in Beta," it's starting to come together in what I think are really amazing ways. If you haven't seen it yet, take a look:

http://menagerielitmagazine.wordpress.com/

We're actively pursuing critiques, good and bad, and we'd love any response you may have. But perhaps some context would help.

Natasha Watts is heading this up. She's proven herself a very passionate leader with solid ideas on what will make this work. Her enthusiasm has definitely impacted my own interest and involvement in the project. But I think as a group, together, we have managed to sort of transcend our original ideaof merely an online lit magazine. Now, we crave interactivty and connectedness. And we're getting there.

It's a slow process.

Right now, we're still working on management and organization, trying to figure out how to solicit submissions and best manage those referrals. It's a working progress, but the main point is...it's working. Behind the scenes can be a little messy--as with any "show," especially in its first run--but I think it's pulling together. I'm excited to see it blossom so to speak, and I'm even more thrilled to be a part of it. So stay tuned and keep following. I'm sure it will be something special.

In Medias Res

Though I recently wrote a post gushing about my change of heart, I find myself happy to write again at this, the middle of things.

First, I look back at reading Wisdom of the Crowds, a book about group work being more than group work. It was an interesting book but, when I first started, I wasn't really anticipating it changing anything about what I thought. After all, I've been in college for four years and I've had my share of group projects--hated every one. "Wisdom of the Crowds" was practically an oxymoron. After reading it, though, I suddenly understood that people really can be helpful; I don't always have to go it alone. It's something we already practice: Google searches, Wikipedia, online communities; Q&A's like Yahoo Answers and Answers.com. We love aggregated knowledge, and this is a book explaining why it works. It was a great way to start my involvement in this class--something built upon and practiced through crowds and groups and interaction, both physical and digital.

Then, there was the literature. A class where I got to choose my book? After years studying Frankenstein too many times, reading and rereading Wordsworth and Poe, analyzing the likes of Shakespeare and Austen to death, this self-guided learning was a breath of fresh air. I excitedly chose Jurassic Park, a favorite book--probably considered too mainstream to study at university--and immediately began gushing about it here, here, and here. It's been great exploring media's impact through a literary lens. Jurassic Park is pretty much far and away from the digital sphere (it is about dinosaurs, after all), but I've loved analyzing the text in relation to our digital landscape. Whenever I find myself lost online, I suddenly wonder if I'm feeding a monster I can't quite understand. Is it good? Is it bad? Are we all screwed from this reliance on technology? I've found myself bringing it up to family and friends; I'm constantly thinking about it: dinosaurs and media.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Because, the truth is, this class has inspired more out-of-class work than I've ever allowed myself to dedicate to another class. I am obsessed with what's being discussed not only in class but in the world. I have found myself connecting to the digital world more than I ever have, getting and actually using a twitter account, diigo, flickr, linkedin, tumblr. I try to use pinterest and blogger better, connecting and talking things over with strangers on the web. I even signed up for a myspace account--all because Justin Timberlake promised it would be cool. I am so much more aware of how much media means to me, posting about it here and here. Having to post every day on Google+ means I'm constantly looking out for news and information pertaining to our digital age. It's so interesting, making little connections between current events and what is happening on a digital level. I find myself so much more involved in politics, especially with the upcoming election, where I'm reading about the impact of social media even as I participate in it. Facebook groups, twitter trends, media commentary: I inhale it. Plus, my group project means I'm doing a lot outside of class. I'm participating with peers to create something meaningful, and I'm excited about it (as you can see here).

And that's another thing that is so great about this class. I get to learn not only from a professor but from a bunch of like-minded students just as excited and enthused as I am. I've never been in such a lively class where people share their varying opinions not with impatience or pride but with passion and interest. We're all curious to figure it out together. I'm obsessed with reading their blogs and following their Google+ feeds. There's so much to be said and I'm glad I don't have to be the one to say it all. I've always been one interested in knowing what people are thinking, even when I disagree. The fact that this class is mostly played out on Google+ makes it so easy to read these differing ideas and get involved with what most interests me.

That being said, I have rather eclectic taste when it comes to digital culture and its various facets, subjects, concerns and creations. Mostly, though, I find myself drawn to media's impact on culture, from popular to political. People often turn their noses down at the "laymen" who overrun the web, but I find the community aspect of the digital world so interesting, both the good and the bad. So I write about bullying, I comment on transmedia and remix, I obsess over what's happening now. Because of all that, I'm excited about my participation with the online magazine. The idea of blending medias to highlight a common idea is exciting. It's a website allowing for final drafts to still receive a sort of community. We're all excited about it and I'm ready to see it come together. As things continue, I'm eager to remain involved in the pop culture aspect of everyday affairs and I'm ready to help craft a magazine as part of the acquisitions team for my group.

It's been an interesting semester thus far and I'm excited to see everything play out. Digital culture is so vast, it's exciting to watch everyone branch out into their various passions and pursuits. But, as one of the great benefits of a digital world, we can all remain connected during it. You don't have to have singular tastes now. And that is an exhilarating thought. 

Now for the Surprise Twist

Just finished Jurassic Park and it got me thinking. I started it knowing it would be easy to relate to the dangers of a consequence-free, uncontrollable digital world. And that's still very true. Regardless of happy posts and/or rants, I know there's a lot of danger from the internet and/or relying on it too much. But as I wrapped up another exciting read, I was wondering why I love such a horrific book. One, I love dinosaurs (who doesn't?) Two, I love the movie (as everyone should). Three, I really like the ideas behind it. I like the questions it brings up. How far is too far? When is enough enough? Should one person control those sort of fates? Can they? And then I'm wondering...would it have been better for it to never have happened?

Probably. But, seeing as I love dinosaurs, I love the movies, and I love pretty much everything about this book, I'm suddenly a big fan for dinosaur win.


After all, in the book (and the sequel, The Lost World), dinosaurs aren't exactly vilified. It's the men who created them thinking they could control them--they were the villains. The dinosaurs were actually inspiring and interesting. Characters went on and on about them and how awesome they were and how crazy it was to have them there in the flesh (Except raptors which are, let's be honest here, terrifying creatures possessed by demons). So it's not so much a horror story about dinosaurs wreaking havoc; rather, that is merely the consequence of the real horror: those of men banking on  controlling something that shouldn't belong to just one man.

It makes for an interesting twist in my digital culture debate. Is the technology to blame or those trying to manipulate it for their control, gain, protection, whatever? After all, this is the most amazing age to live in. I don't think anyone's really aching to go some-hundred years (no matter the popularity of Downton Abbey. Or Game of Thrones.) This isn't the most idyllic time period and there are definite problems (almost as horrific as raptors ripping you apart...or compys chewing on you bit by bit). But I think, overall, we should be glad for the opportunity to live in this digital age. Probably more glad than those stuck in a weekend of horror, trapped on an island with voracious man-eaters. This is a great time filled with great technologies. Though the risks might be just as great and the threats just as horrifying, we've got it pretty good. Just remember: we're in beta. It's a working progress.

Kinda like a dinosaur park.... Also, kinda not.

A Revelation

I think this class has changed me. Not in some metaphysical, life-altering way. Well, maybe life-altering. But it's definitely changed the way I look at things.

I used to be a purist. I used to believe nothing is as good as the original, that anyone championing an interpretation or remake was ignorant and shallow-minded.

I used to be afraid of the internet. Or callous towards the idea of tweeting every thought or instagramming every meal. Social media was for the self-absorbed and it had no real value. I used it only in was I thought above the norm--such as reaching my brothers across seas.

I used to think the internet was damning good writing, well-crafted thought, and all originality. It was the place where cat videos ruled and comments were made up of "UR" and "LOL."

I used to think digital culture was a sign of the end of the world, where we would end up so plugged in, all those cheesy movies like Surrogates would be right.  

Also, I used to hate google plus. A lot.

I used to be pretty close-minded about the whole thing. As did family, friends, most acquaintances. Then I was in this class and I found myself first playing the devils advocate just for kicks. Whenever my dad went off about how stupid twitter was, I would smugly say, "Actually, in my digital culture class..." And when my mom would complain that posting everything to FB would come back to haunt you, I would laugh and say "This is just the age we live in, mom."

I had a long conversation with my little sister this weekend. We were coming home from conference (where my experience had definitely been heightened by my tuning in to the twitter feed) and I asked her what she thought of remixes and transmedia. She was getting mad at people who liked She's the Man without knowing it was based on Shakespeare's Twelfth Night.

It was interesting...uh, arguing with her about the different value the modern age has given things. I found myself standing up for this digital culture in ways I hadn't really anticipated me ever caring about.  Sarah Talley, in my class, got me addicted to The Lizzie Bennet Diaries on youtube. My professor has made me more aware of twitter and google plus--where, before, I was just uselessly browsing celebrity fodder, now I can find important information and interesting discussions. People are active on the web, not because they're stupid or antisocial, but because it allows for instant and valid conversations--between complete strangers. Sure, some people are really stupid online and it can definitely be manipulated in dangerous ways. But I am so grateful for it.

And it was arguing with my little sister about how she couldn't hate on something retelling a story she loved for a different audience (and isn't Twelfth Night just a remix, too?) that I realized something.


I have changed. Halle-freakin-lujah. 

Gotta Feeling

As you may be able to tell from this blog, I'm a big fan of technology, the social interweb, and all that good stuff. I just got involved with a group hoping to make an online literary magazine. While some lit mags have made their way to the internet, offering e-versions of their printed materials, these sites are often uninviting and not at all interactive. On the other side, there are hundreds of writing communities online where people submit and review each others' pieces, but this takes on a review-and-edit-like stance where the shared materials are not the final drafts; rather they are just being prepared for publication and catered to an audience. While both of these sorts are grand testaments to the power, popularity, and connectivity of literature, we hope to combine the best of both and make an e-based literary magazine where the texts are final products that go through a vetting process but where the site allows for social interaction through commenting, sharing, liking, and voting on favorite submissions. We hope to make the literary magazine accessible and personable while keeping it structured and allowing for new voices to be heard, shared, and appreciated. It's something I'm excited about mostly because I feel like the internet can often be a place of extremes.

On one hand, we have the hoity-toity highbrows who feel the internet is destroying culture and thus cling to the printed form. On the other, there's a sort of publish-anything mentality where everything is put out there and the author expects a pat on the back. But I like the middle ground, somewhere where the respectable culture of the printed can meet the liveliness and vitality of the digital crowd. For me, then, this is an opportunity to blend sides, break boundaries...and perhaps stick it to the man on both accounts.

I think this can be a huge success--where people serious about writing can interact with those serious about reading. They can interact, they can receive feedback, but they can also be celebrated for their hard work in writing something worth publishing. 

So hoorah for literature! And hoorah for a new age and new medium! This is gonna be good.