Embittered Entrapment

I really enjoyed Katie Wilkie's blog post here about if her badges motivated students or not. Like she points out, a lot of people in this world tend to be apathetic towards learning. Learning is no longer about discovering the best self; it's tied only to grades and school and class. The idea of self-directed learning is something of a lost art. Laziness has been perpetuated, in my humble opinion, by schools and programs that see students as test scores and results. Gone are the days of classicist education (unless you go to Cambridge) where you'd gather together to LEARN rather than merely pass a class or get a degree.

Like Katie said,

For students who are required to do a certain amount of work for a grade, doing other separate work NOT for a grade probably feels either like an unwise use of time or pointless.

Ah, yes. Learning isn't about knowledge, it's about the letter you get for it. The percentage it matters. The grade it will get you. A teacher can offer an amazing opportunity to go and do something, but the only way the professor gets anyone to show is if there's extra credit in the mix. No longer is experience or learning enough. We want grades, grades, grades.

But I'm a perpetrator too. I am infamously lazy. Well, usually. I coast through classes and have an average GPA and average college experience to prove for it. The sad thing is I wasn't always this way. I used to love learning--I used to be a self-teacher. See, once upon a time...I was homeschooled.

I know, I know. Let's here the jokes now; trust me, it's nothing new. But let's get the stereotypes out of the way, because I promise you it's nothing like the overall-wearing, socially awkward, nerd-in-glasses-sitting-at-a-desk-and-listening-to-her-mom-lecture type. I didn't have overbearing, overzealous parents who didn't let me watch TV or read popular fiction. I wasn't trapped on a farm in the middle of nowhere believing that guns were man's best friend. Then again, I wasn't traipsing around outside, never studying, just playing games in the playgrounds by the school to taunt all the other kids.

My mom pulled me out of school right before I started 6th grade. I had just moved from Texas to Utah the year before and, let me tell you, the school system is different. I was years ahead of my peers in Utah. And so I was bored. And restless. And not learning anything. Hence the homeschooling. But it was based on a program known as TJYE: Thomas Jefferson Youth Education (please don't look it up; it kind of went crazy a few years back).

It was a classical education dependent of self-directed learning mostly based in classic works. Thus began four years spent studying Shakespeare, Elliot, Austen, Tennyson, Homer. But it wasn't just English. I was in the company of Aristotle, Newton, Curie, Rousseau. And it wasn't because someone was lording over me with a textbook telling me what to do and read. It was because I, as a little twelve year old girl, found all of it engaging, and I willfully woke up every morning, got out of bed and dressed, and sat down to study whatever it was I wanted that day.

Looking back, it was an amazing experience. A couple years into it, I joined a co-op of like-minded people (that would be homeschoolers--I know, actually getting together to interact) who took classes together like Economics, Philosophy, History, Politics. I was writing blue book essays, creating powerpoints, organizing projects--all things that made college feel familiar. I'm not joking. It was a really great time, and I owe SO MUCH of who I am to it.

But then things changed. My mom had to go to work and I went to high school.

Throw together a sentence with "high school" and "valuable learning" and, let me tell you, you've got a good joke right there.

Too far? Well, let me tell you that, for me, high school didn't work. It really nearly destroyed me. Not because of anti-sociality or bullying or high stress or anything like that. I just lost all motivation. Somehow, someway, that conveyor belt form of education killed the magic of learning for me. I realized very quickly that what I learned didn't matter as much as how I proved the teacher right. Whether that meant bending to a writing style, filling out endless forms of busywork, or being just as lazy and (might I say it?) dumb as they were, I did it. Since there was nothing challenging to interact with, I gave up on challenging myself. I became a coaster. A really talented, resentful little coaster. I'm pretty good at it. And I carried it to college.

So Katie's post--about motivation and extra miles--really struck a nerve. Because, no, I'm not some super genius who graduated college a decade early, nor am I some anti-social freak cringing every time someone walks by. I'm just average. I fit in, I blend in, I do the work. But I have nothing to show for it...except grades. A good ole GPA I can carry with me.

"See!" I can clamor endlessly. "See! I really am smart. This paper says so!"

Ah, the joys of higher education.

Maybe I sound resentful. But I know it's my fault. I let the man win. I let the system beat me. I gave up caring. I mean, maybe not completely--some subjects still elicit a sense of excitement and hard work from me. But, let me tell you, those GE requirements--all those classes? Already forgotten. Completely. Which is a shame. And I can't really say what could change to make it different. But I was just thinking about it, and thought I'd share. Life is hard for the extra-milers, but maybe the extended view makes it worth it. Maybe Miley Cyrus had it right:

"It's not about how fast you get there, it's not about what's waiting on the other side....it's the climb."

Just Gettin' Started

My little sister posted this on my wall today:

Disregarding the casual jargon (and the obvious favoritism towards me), it's referencing Shannon Green's submission that recently made it onto our official new website, menagerie.byu.edu. In class today, us on the Menagerie team were wondering whose friend she was or which of us she was related to. See, here at Menagerie, we're not used to people just randomly finding us and submitting. We've been bullying those acquaintances and buddies into sending stuff our way. Cuz they love us and all. And because they're talented, of course. But, somehow, this single (and rather clever) new post marks a new page! A new dawning! A new day!

Someone found us.

My sister did some investigating for me since she knows Shannon and it makes it less awkward that way. So I decided to email her to get her side of the story--seeing as she's sort of our favorite person right about now. And this is what I got.

Thank you so much for submitting my piece -- I was overjoyed to be accepted! 

That's called enthusiasm, people. And we love it.

What followed after that was a brief little Q&A...

How did you hear about Menagerie? 
I found Menagerie when you came to Margaret's creative writing class and introduced it to us.

What was your impression of our original website?
I first saw the site when it was still on wordpress. I liked the site and the ideas behind it, although it was a little bare! But I completely understood that it was a fairly new launch, and I absolutely loved the idea of having a cycled theme every few months.

Is this your first published piece?
Yes! This is my first published piece! I have posted work online before, but I have never been published in a real magazine.

Are you excited about this new website? 
I am extremely excited about Menagerie Magazine! I think it's a spectacular idea to give aspiring writers a chance to showcase their work!

How do you feel about the idea of only the highest rated pieces being archived on the website? Is it motivation to stay involved?
Your idea to only archive the most popular pieces is an interesting one. It certainly puts more pressure (not bad, just pressure) on the authors to market their work so they can continue to be read on the site. I just hope that my work is read enough to stay!

How are you going to market your piece?
I've already told my friends on Facebook that I have been published in the Menagerie, although I think I might need to bug them about it again if they haven't already read and commented on it! Other than that, I don't have a particularly potent way of marketing my writing.


So there you have it. Our first bona fide submitter with a palpable bit of excitement. With that in mind, it's my pleasure to start our official launch day. Menagerie is up and running and eagerly accepting any and all submissions. This is your chance to be heard and to get involved with some friendly competition to stay on top. Staying true to our name, we're accepting any and all sorts: creative writing, creative non-fiction, poetry, film, music, art, photography, etc. Please see our submissions page and follow the instructions there. If you want to see more on what we're about and how we started, visit this page or our blog, Making Menagerie. Be sure to follow us on twitter (@menagerieonline) and look out for our upcoming Facebook page. And be as excited as Shannon Green, because she is right: this is a spectacular place, and we want it to be a place where...well, a place for art to gather.

Menagerie

I wrote a post for our Menagerie group on our blog: http://makingmenagerie.wordpress.com/

Read our story from beginning to end. And be sure to visit our new site: menagerie.byu.edu

Let us know what you think and, as always, be sure to submit and tell your friends to submit.

My name is Shelby Boyer...and I Have a Problem

Turns out I'm a substance abuser. I am addicted to the internet. Cuz it's a real thing (read here about the brain damage teenagers are getting from over-internet exposure). I know I didn't really do the fast last time, but I was accidentally screwed this weekend when the power went out and I couldn't charge my phone. Suddenly, minutes passed like days until I was beating my head against the wall wondering what on earth I was supposed to do. I wanted my phone--I needed the internet--I was desperate for a fix! But the ironic thing was...I had been cut off in the middle of watching an episode of Revolution.
This is a television show about society after a major inexplicable black-out wipes out all electronic activity. In this world, after that, nothing works. And people are crazy, and everything goes to pot, yadayadayada. Watch it...if you like melodrama + guns and guts.

In any case, there I was, facing my own meltdown over not having the technology to watch a show about not having technology.

The irony wasn't lost on me.

In fact, it gave me reason to pause. That, and my sister pulled out our old Harry Potter Clue game, so I was quickly distracted. And I realized that maybe possibly life without the internet--at least overnight--aint so bad. Sure, it's freezing and dark. But you have the excuse to chow down on ice cream that's starting to melt. And you get to have real face time with people you might sometimes possibly forget are actually in the same room. And while I may or may not have, pathetically, had instagram captions runnning through my head as I itched for the chance to snap a photo, I eventually handled it with grace. The main point: I survived.

Let's just not mention the fact that  as soon as those lights came back on, I was plugged in and getting a major fix. I just think it's good, once in a while, to take a step back and consider--consider the good and bad of this over-connected age and all that jazz.

Over and out.